Is your child smart? The possibility that your answer is “yes” is enormous. And, possibly, you’re right: Children and teens are often smart. The bad news, however, is that it doesn’t mean much.
The bad news, however, is that it doesn’t mean much. It was to this conclusion that Carol Dweck, a professor in the psychology department at Stanford University, came after years of study. In her thesis turned into the book Mindset – The New Psychology of Success, Carol defends the belief in her own development as the great key to school and professional success. That is, intelligence and talent, by themselves, do not move mountains. But they will be very well used if they are added to the effort, dedication and willingness to learn.
Next, better understand what protagonism is and see how to stimulate this non-cognitive capacity or socio-emotional competence in your child.
What is the role?
It is the ability to see yourself as the main agent of life. Those who show leadership are responsible for their attitudes, distinguish their actions from those of others, and express initiative and self-confidence. For school performance, this characteristic is very welcome, since the “protagonist” student believes that he can learn and strives to achieve it.
Hard work is worth it
“No matter what I do, nothing works” is the anthem of people who become victims. Why not give this example to your child, at the risk of spending her life blaming others for her failures? If a goal is not achieved, it is necessary to analyze if the path to achieve it was the appropriate one. Try to show your child that the effort is worth it: tell him about the goals he has achieved in life, tell success stories of others and propose activities that demonstrate it: if we plant a tree and take good care of it, one day it will bear fruit ; if we organize ourselves, we will be able to read this entire collection of books by the end of the year; etc.
“good at math and bad at English” Enough?
These marks, such as “being good at math” and “not having a talent for sports” do not help at all and do not reflect reality.
We are all capable of developing in any discipline, as long as we have the proper teaching. After all, if we couldn’t learn, what would be the school?
Encourage your child to want to challenge himself in all disciplines and discover his interest in all of them, not just those that seem easier.
Say yes to autonomy
Autonomy is closely related to protagonism, since the person who manages to do so only gains self-esteem and independence. And how do you promote your child’s autonomy? For the child to become an autonomous subject, she needs to learn to take care of herself, understand herself, and only then understand the other.
How to facilitate this path for your child? Letting it act and experiment. The first time the two-year-old girl drinks water alone, she will spill a lot. Gradually, less will be spilled, until no more is spilled. In the case of adolescents, it is recommended that they be responsible for household chores, such as always carrying the plate to the sink and tidying up their room.
Making mistakes is human. But even though we know that, we often turn small mistakes made by children and teenagers into true dramas. Did you forget the open door of the refrigerator? Did you miss the delivery date of a job? Did they break something? They are minutiae and sometimes even screams, for sure. Well, from now on, try to do it differently. Making mistakes is not the problem. The problem is not being corrected.
We all bring something unique to the world. Invite your child to think about her own story and how it plays a role in her future. Visit our Cyberschool site and discover the programs we have prepared for your children.